The Attack

A Short Long story…………..

It was already 11:00 PM when he reached home. It has been a long day. He switched on the lights of his one hall-kitchen House. A house in Mumbai was a luxury. And even with the so-called good-pay he got, the room’s rent was heavy for his pockets. The clock on the wall said the time was just past 11:00 PM. Its almost been 15 hours since he left for work. He slumped on the bed.

The day have not been good from the word go today. Lots of fights, stress and grumbling in the office. Its good that he had eaten outside. He was in no mood to cook food. That too, when he had to get up early. He lay there on the bed thinking. He was a small town boy. His family was not poor but was not rich either. He studied hard because his father said education was important. He believed his father. School and colleges later, he found a job in the booming software industry.

Sure he had to leave his home town, but the future looked promising. He strived hard to make a name. He worked almost everyday without any life of his own. Life was schedules, dead-lines, codes, servers and all that computer jargon. He couldn’t remember the last time he had relaxed. Sleep was necessary because the office refused to have him for 24 hours a day. Not that he was in any financial mess. But He wanted to give his family a better life. They were surely well off now with his brother also in a good job.

But the constant working had left him a machine. He was an office person. He could not remember the last time he relaxed on a weekend. He was so tired on a weekend that he slept through the whole day. He did not have anything to do on weekends too. He looked at the clock on the wall. It was already around midnight. He had to sleep. It was a big day tomorrow.

He started getting up. He felt a pain in his chest at the same time. His eyes shut from the sensation of the pain. He knew the pain was just for a short time. Some muscle or something was hurting. He lay still for some time. The pain was severe. It stayed for a while then slowly began to subsidies. He breathed deeply and got up.

He went to the kitchen and suddenly felt thirsty. Just as he was pouring water in the glass, he felt a slight pain in his chest again, this time close to the heart. Actually, he was not sure it was the heart or near the heart. He stood there holding the kitchen platform. The pain was more this time. Beads of sweat broke from his forehead. The pain became to subsidies again. He wiped the sweat from his forehead and washed his face. He kept the water running for sometime as he bent over the basin. The pain in his heart was still there but had reduced considerably. After some time he felt much better. He came out of the kitchen and changed his clothes.

He lay on the bed, his tired body appreciating the softness and the comfort of the bed. He was still feeling the pain in the chest. He wondered how the pain was still there after so much time. He changed his position on the bed. He wanted to sleep but his mind was occupied by the pain. He was getting worried now. He tossed and turned on the bed to forget it. He needed sleep. There was so much work in the office. The pain was still there. Was his left hand also paining, he wondered? His mind started working fast. When his uncle had died a few years ago of a heart attack, he had complained of his left hand paining. From that day, he always associated the pain in the left hand with heart attack.

Was he getting a heart attack? How could he? He was just 29. He had heard of people dying of heart attack at a young age. But never he knew anybody who had died so young. Sure, there was somebody, who knew somebody who had a friend who died at a very young age. However, personally he didn’t know anybody. The pain was not much but it was consistent. He was not sure if his hand or his heart was paining.

Why do these things happen at night? He wondered. He was alone in the house. Should he call anyone? What do he tell them? That, he may be having a heart attack. He looked at the clock. It was past 12:00 midnight. He breathed heavily. He needed to relax. It may not be a heart attack. But if he keep thinking about it, he might just get one. He needed to relax. He wished someone were with him at that moment. Someone who could give him assurance.

He lay on his bed, hoping that the pain would just disappear like every time. What if he died now? Nobody had the key to his house. Would somebody miss him at the office? He was not that important in the office. Atleast he thought he was not that important. People could carry on without even realizing that he was absent. Maybe he should call up somebody from his office. What for? To tell them that he won’t be coming to office because he might be dead. What do they care? Maybe he should call his friends. He didn’t have friends here. This was not his city. People working with him were his colleagues and not his friends.

He tossed on the bed, sleeping on his hand. It may just be that he had pulled a muscle and his hand was paining because of it. There was an unknown fear in his mind. The clock ticks were more audible in the silence of the night. Does a heart attack stay for so long? He may be having a mild attack.

His breathing became heavy. He shut down the lights. Was he really going to die? What if nobody realized that he had died? He could be dead for days until his body started to decay. When the neighbors complain, the police would come and break open the door. He put on the lights.

He lay still for some time. He wanted to sleep. What if he died in his sleep? His eyes opened again. What would happen to his parents and family? Would they miss him? They had strived hard to teach him. Now when it was his time to make them happy, he was going to die. What would happen to them after his death? His brother was working but he was not working enough to support the family. He was paying for a good insurance policy. The insurance money will take care for some years. His brother better think about getting a better job. His dad needed that cataract operation fast. Would his insurance cover all those expenses. He hoped he hadn’t forgotten to pay the premiums. He went to the desk where he kept all his documents. He searched the whole drawer to find the last premium receipt. He paid through the net so atleast he should get some kind of receipt. “If I survive I would keep everything in order” he promised himself. He searched frantically and finally found it. Yes! He though, he had paid the last premium.

The clock on the wall said 3:00 O’clock. It was almost more than three hours since the pain has started. He wasn’t even sure if there was a pain in his chest. He wasn’t even sure if his left hand was paining. There was a thin line between reality and imagination and sleep was erasing that thin line. He was tired of waiting for the big pain to come. He walked to the window of his 2nd floor rented apartment. Everything was quite down there with a few stray dogs wandering around. Everyone in the neighboring buildings were fast asleep. Would they know if he died today? Would they care? Maybe for a first few days they will speak. But after few days, maybe week, everything will be forgotten. There will be a new tenant in the apartment. Maybe his family will remember him but then they would also have a life to live.

And she? Would she also remember him? Its been more than a year since she got married. He had also heard that she was pregnant. Will she remember him? Miss him? Its good that they didn’t get married. She would have been a widow after today.

It was almost more than 20 hours since he had slept. He was tired, very tired but afraid to sleep. The fear of being dead in his sleep was more than the fatigue. He was just waiting. Waiting for the night to end. Waiting for his death. Waiting for the final pain, when his heart would stop working.

He walked to the refrigerator and saw a lone coke bottle, unopened. He searched for an opener and found one. If he had to die, why not have the last coke before dying? He drank the whole bottle in a single gulp. He was feeling the need to burp loudly. Good manners said it was not right to burp loudly. But who cared today? It was his last day on earth. Who was there to watch? He belched noisily to let out the gas out from his stomach. It was always a pleasure to burp after a good aerated drink. He burped once more and smiled happily. It was fun to let out a big burp.

He continued to drink from the remaining bottle when he realized that the pain was gone. Just the way it had started, suddenly. He couldn’t figure it out. What had he done? And that was when it stuck him, just like you always realize how foolish you can be. The food. Of course the food, and a lot of it. The food he had eaten so hurriedly. He laughed at his own foolishness. He had a heavy lunch and that had caused the gas. He smiled and then he laughed uncontrollable laughter. He had heard many stories when common gas was a reason for chest pains.

It was almost 4:00 o’clock in the morning. It was almost 4 hours of terror and waiting and it was a long wait but what he had been waiting for never did come. He just came close to death, maybe even touched it but maybe his time had not come, not yet. He sat on the only chair in the room. His body relaxed and he sensed a small sense of peace within him. He looked at the watch and realized that he still had 3-4 hours before he was back at work.

Should he be really going to work? What is it that makes him do the same thing day after day? What if he didn’t go to work? Yes that what he needed to do. Not go to work. Take a break and live life a little. He got up switched off the lights and laid on the bed. He planned to take a break. Nothing was going to stop without him and life for others would just go on. It was time to take hold of his life. His eyes began to close when he remembered something. He got up and switched off the alarm that rang every day.

No alarm would ring that morning.